Saturday, May 22, 2010


Today, I finished The Book of Mormon. I made it through Moroni 9, which I never like to read. It hurts my heart to hear how horrible both the Lamanites and the Nephites behaved.
But, I found an answer to prayer amidst the yuck. Mormon writes to Moroni by saying, “let us labor diligently; for if we should cease to labor, we should be brought under condemnation; for we have a labor to perform whilst in this tabernacle of clay, that we may conquer the enemy of all righteousness, and rest our souls in the kingdom of God” (Moro. 9:6).
I’ve been really struggling lately as a mother. One of my sons is going through a difficult time and it affects the whole family and atmosphere of our home. I also home school him, and it is like pulling teeth to get him to do anything. I wonder if my efforts are making any difference. Some days, I just want to give up. It feels like every moment is filled with disrespect and contention. However, it is nothing compared to the atmosphere in which Mormon and Moroni lived.
I know that I must “labor diligently” and not cease, even when I don’t see results of my labors. I’m grateful for the grace of Christ spoken about in Moro. 10:32. I know that “his grace is sufficient” to help me in this situation and to help my son as well. I’ll continue pleading for that grace to help me through this difficult time.
This time, as I’ve studied the Book of Mormon, I have again felt gratitude and love for the truths in it. These truths can and do help me to stay on the path of righteousness. This book is like an old friend that I love spending time with. I know what’s coming next, and yet the Spirit brings different verses to my attention that I am in need of at the moment they’re needed. I am so thankful that I have the opportunity to listen to the words that have been preserved to lead me back to Christ. Now, I’ll begin again.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

"I will not deny the Christ"

Well, the Nephites and the Jaradites are destroyed now. It doesn’t matter how many times I read The Book of Mormon, they always die. I’m saddened as I read and see their change from depending on the Lord, to hating those that believe in Christ.
Needless grief must have filled the souls of those 24 Nephites that stood on the hill and witnessed the annihilation of their people. No wonder Mormon mourns and records his mourning. His words should stand as a warning to us in our day to choose only Christ. If only his people would have stayed true, they would have been spared and even protected.
The people of Jarad end up in the same boat (after the barges, of course). They too seek to kill the prophets and turn their backs on the Lord. It seems incredible to me that they would rather die than repent.
Then, we have Moroni who has fought for his people, and watched them die. He then writes the words of the Book of Ether, and sees their destruction as well. He knows the perils of believing in Christ- the LamanittesLamanites are killing all who believe. Yet he declares, “ And I, Moroni, will not deny the Christ” (Moro. 1:3).
What a fantastic example and disciple of the Savior. Whereas his people would rather die than repent, Moroni would rather die than deny the Christ.
I am grateful for Moroni for enduring faithfully, and suffering loneliness and grief so that we could have the truthfulness of the gospel found in the Book of Mormon. He surely played a vital role in its coming forth.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

In The Lord's Hands

Thank you to Audrey for sharing a little part of her story with us.


“in early 2003, i was pregnant with my third child. the whole pregnancy was something of a spiritual experience. i had known all along that something was different. i could feel myself being prepared, and ,thoughts that seemed crazy at the time, raced through my mind about the potentials of what i could be facing. I, like most pregnant mothers, had a routine 20 week ultrasound scheduled, but this time i wasn’t anxious to race off to find out "what i was having"- as if thats the reason behind that test. So, i canceled my apt without even knowing why for sure. i rescheduled it for about a week later, with no real apparent explanation.
the day finally arrived and i felt as though i was headed to a funeral. the day itself was dark and gloomy and it paralleled my feelings. i was desperately concerned and even at that point, feared the baby (who was actually still moving inside me) was dead.
On the way into the hospital, i saw a few women outside- clearly pregnant- heading inside. one had just finished smoking, and i felt a surge of severe anger that her baby was healthy and mine was not. i felt very judgemental and angry. as i looked around the waiting room, that anger continued to grow as i began to dwell on how unfair this was. looking backwards with hindsight i of course see that my hand was far more blessed then theirs and guilt now surges my veins.
It didnt take long for the emotions on the technicians face to translate into concern. i quickly noticed the awkwardness of my babies feet and promptly started asking questions. i overwhelmed and scared her right out of the room. A tall lanky doc appeared and started reviewing her pics and taking his own, i over inundated him with questions. until he finally turned off the machine and quietly said, i think your baby has spina bifida and some other deformities. the rest was a blur. i started crying and, of course, so did nate. But i cried with relief that the unknown had become known and, that i now could focus on the task at hand, and move on.

he gave us a few min and then we met him down the hall in his office to talk about treatment plans. in this man's office, i learned how involved the Lord had been; how is hand had so intricately placed people and places in the right times and moments. the week prior when my apt was supposed to occur, this doc had been at a fetal surgery conference for the opening of a study called MOMS, for spina bifida fetal treatment. had i gone when i was supposed to, this particular doc would have been away and i would have met with a colleague instead. He had only been back one day, and the study itself would open for enrollment the following day. here was a treatment option placed intricately and timely in our laps.

as difficult as it was to take in the prognosis of what we were facing and what it meant, as bleak as it was and as emotionally devastated as we were, neither my husband or i could deny the presence and participation of the Lord. That office that day was a holy place for us."

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Everlasting Kindness

I am so grateful for the kindness of the Lord. I have loved reading again how he ministered to the troubled people of 3 Nephi after the massive destruction following his death. I can only imagine the terror that must have filled their hearts and minds as storms raged, the land changed, darkness enveloped, and their loved ones perished. Christ appeared to them, allowed them to feel the wounds in his body, gave the disciples power to baptize, taught them, provided the sacrament for them, healed their sick and ministered to their little children. He must have provided so much hope and comfort for them.
In chapter 22, Christ speaks about the gathering of Israel, and uses such words of love, saying, “but my kindness shall not depart from thee, neither shall the covenant of my peace be removed” (v. 10). With “mercy” (v. 8) and everlasting kindness” (v. 8) he will gather his people. Several times, Christ tells the people of Israel –as well as us- not to fear, but to trust that he will be there.
So many times in my life, I have found this to be true. He has not left me alone, but has shown me mercy and such everlasting kindness. I am so grateful for and depend upon his love and mercy. Without his kindness, there would be no way to make hard times into places of holiness.